This societal obsession with weight?!

WHAT IN THE WORLD IS WITH THIS SOCIETAL OBSESSION WITH WEIGHT!?!?!?! I know in other cultures it's not like this and frankly I'm sick of it! I cannot even compliment a girl who is 14 weeks pregnant on how she's cute because she's already showing without her being touchy and calling me an idiot!!! Shouldn't pregnancy be an excuse for not fitting into this societies norm of skinniness? It isn't even a norm for that matter no one is model skinny and if they are go them. I'm just as much a victim to the societies norm as anyone else. I'm 5'2" and 122 pounds and here I obsess too much as well. Just like in my last blog complaining about how I need to get rid of my love handles, but let's face it no one's built the same and try as I might those may never fully go away. But what's the problem with that anyway!? Sometimes I look at pictures of myself and think "oh wow that's a horrible picture." That picture has nothing to do with who I am though. My body shape, face shape, makeup, hair, shoes, nothing material and visual has nothing to do with who I am as a person!

Sorry so short...

New tattoo along with losing those love handles!

So I am getting a new tattoo, I've wanted it forever and I'm kinda scared because it's big! I gotta find someone awesome to do it so I have to ask around. It's very important to me so it cannot be changed AT ALL and must be perfect! I think the lines are hard so that's why I have to find someone who is really really good!

Shane drew her when he was probably 16 and EVERYONE asked for her. Ex girlfriends, his mom, all sorts of people wanted her. For my 16th birthday Shane had her framed and gave her to me. It was (along with the poem my sister wrote me last year) one of the best birthday presents I ever got. Even while Shane and I were broken up (over and over again) she always remained hanging on my wall. I used to have tinkerbells (including one he drew) hanging with her but today she hangs across the room from where I sleep and is the only fairy still hanging around. I've decided to get her on my back her wings will circle around my left hip and the tip of her hair will probably touch my spine. She'll sit on my pant line and her feet will then go below my pants. I'm really excited for this one however... I HAVE TO LOSE MY DANG LOVE HANDLES!!!

Love handles you may ask?! Trust me, I may be tiny as most may say but I have my fair share of the muffin top. It's the only place on my body I'm insecure about and until they are gone and stay gone for some time I need to wait for the tattoo. The tattoo is my reward and motivation to continue to work out, lose an extra inch or two off my hips, and stay in shape! I work out through yoga and abs as well as some exercises Shane has found on the internet for me and will be walking everywhere NO EXCUSES!!! I've lost 3 pounds since I began working out, but I've decided due to these love handles no shrinking it's time to kick it into full gear!! So look out tattoo artists, pavement, and yoga mat here I come!!!

Sun and books

Wow! It's been a nice LONG weekend! I only worked until 10 on Friday so my weekend started early. After Lindsey and I got off work we showered and went to Cheyenne to meet our mom for a family day thing that her work had planned. Unfortunately we grabbed burger king before we left and missed out on the food they had there. For some reason we thought they didn't have food, I think we were just sickened with hunger. We got there and played a game kinda like horse shoes (I won), listened to a band (15 year old boys) who were pretty good but I wouldn't call it family friendly music lol, and just kinda hung out in the sun. We then went to Target and left our door prize tickets with our mom. Lindsey bought some really cute booties for Tayian and we both got a new pair of mocasins (sp.) then we went to Petsmart, then back home. That was kinda the end of our day for that part but we made big plans for the Greek Festival in Cheyenne the next day.

After FINALLY getting to sleep in yesterday I put some pork in the crock pot for dinner, showered, and headed to my mom's. Before we left we stopped by a garage sale in West Laramie and got some cute baby clothes, a pair of jeans for my mom, some kitchen utensils, a candle melter, a tiki station (weird I know Jay wanted it lol), an MWC blanket, and a car seat for Anthony all for under 30 bucks!!! We finally got to the gas station and then headed outta town. It was SO hot in Ft. Collins and I was glad I wore shorts. We ate some gyros walked around the greek festival and went to some stores downtown. Then we ran ALL over the place to get diapers and a rocking chair for my sister. We finally got to target and home depot then Talon and I walked to the bookstore where he bought The Sword of Shannara and I got Julie and Julia.

This brings me to my next part... I finished The Time Traveler's Wife and was in tears as I finished it. I totally understand why Lani didn't like the ending now. I was partial to it but definitely wasn't sure about a couple chapters in the end. However, I have to say that it is brilliantly written and only once again makes me want to write a book. I just don't think I have the imagination that some people do and I don't think I could think up some of those things. What would I write about?! Well I started Julie and Julia last night and am already 100 pages in. It's totally different but I still like it. However, after a book like the Time Traveler's Wife it's almost like it doesn't compare. I don't know what it is with me reading book's that are movies lately? Angels and Demons, The Time Traveler's Wife, Julie and Julia. Maybe it's something about the thought that not only can I imagine it the way I want to, but then I get to see how someone else imagined it. Not sure, but they are all really good books.

Today we woke up around 9, ate a quick breakfast, then headed out to haul hay. Well the boys hauled hay I went on a walk... Shane said that he doesn't think it was 6 miles but it had to be somewhere close to that. When they started hauling I left with the dogs and walked all around the pasture over 5 hills and it had to be about an hour and a half. I don't know about Shane but there's no way that in that amount of time I walked any less than close to 6 miles. I should've brought my camera, but it also reminded me of my jealousy of Cameo's walks. Everywhere she goes there's pictures of something new and that is like that sometimes here... but not quite the same. Maybe I just need to take more time out of my walks and such to see the beauty in them. When I got home I realized I'd eaten about one pop tart since 9:30 and didn't feel well at all. So I slept for a long time after eating some of my pulled pork from last night. I am now finally up and was glad for the fun but restfull weekend!!

It's a girl!!!

So today we went to my sister's doctor appointment to find out if the baby was a girl or boy. We all thought it was a boy we were just convinced mostly because my sister wanted a girl so bad. But today we found out it's a girl!!! Woot!!! My sister cried cuz she was so excited and everyone jumped up and down! We were all in amazement! We were just set it was a boy but no it was a girl!!! So exciting... we are now getting ready to have a suprise congratulations you're having a girl party! Although she's kinda grumpy but I bet that'll change when all her friends get here. I know this is a fairly short one but it's exciting! So that's about all :)

Right before we found out Tayian was a girl!!! Woot!!! We were all so excited!

Tayian's profile picture!!

Lindsey's first girl official girl outfits!!!!

Lindsey and Megan started crying when Lindsey said her favorite part will be playing with dolls and barbies (Megan grew up next door to us and they used to always push their dolls around the block in strollers!)

TADA!!! Soap in the eye!

So we all know I'm blonder than blonde and tonight I learned a very valuable lesson!! NEVER and I mean NEVER!!! look at the soap pump as you're twisting it the opposite direction to open it! If the soap has some pressure it will squirt out upon finally popping open and squirt you with WAY too much soap in your eye! I had to call Shane into the bathroom to help me wash it out because I couldn't open it and I'm sure it looked like I had rabies in my eye there was so much soap! Shane filled the sink with water and I had to put my face in there and look around to wash it out which hurt because water as we know suds up soap but he kept saying put your face back in you have to get it out. Then he came in the bathroom with a shot glass full of cold water and put a shot of cold water in my eye then filled it with saline. He said it was pretty red and dry so I have to blink a lot, I've been blinking for about half an hour and it still hurts but it is getting a little more moist.

Hm... aside from that I have some interesting stuff to talk about. Well not interesting but I guess just an update on life. So Cameo called me a couple days ago to tell me that Mark has to go to the Republic of Georgia for 3 months so she will be here the whole time so she isn't miserable all alone in Cali. I'm excited but sucks also cuz I wouldn't want to spend 3 FULL months away from Shane :( so that has to suck for her at the same time, at least she'll be in good company and I have to be selfish and say WOOHOOO my best friend is coming home!

So today I went for a run and then went out to Shane's parents house where his mom and I picked all the cherries off their 7 or more cherry bushes. We then attempted to pit them which was a HUGE adventure. We ended up with a full bucket of cherries plus a strainer. While she put together this old thing that is supposed to pit and mash the cherries for us I washed about a thousand little cherries. Then we put them in the masher pitter only to find out you cant put a lot in at a time or it wont work and that the little masher is too small for the pits to get out and sometimes the pressure with shoot them out (haha kinda like the soap in the eye) so there were cherry pits all over her kitchen! They would shoot clear across the kitchen, there were streaks and stuff on the walls and stuff it was hilarious!

There's a lady bug in my cherry bucket!!! Can you find him?!

I also threw Shane a surprise birthday dinner Friday at Winger's on Friday. It was so cool I had about 20 people show up and he was totally suprised! He later told me he really appreciated it and it showed my love :) He also told me he's never been suprised which I could tell and that he's hard to suprise and that he hasn't spent his birthday with anyone but his parents since he was a kid. It was cool that I could do that for him and that he was so appreciative and happy about it.

Well that's about all for today... getting tired and time to prepare for the 40 hour plus work week!

School...

I seem to write about school a lot when I'm in school. School starts on the 24th (25th for me because I only have classes Tuesdays and Thursdays) and I'm already starting to study. I just feel the need to be ahead rather than behind all the time, plus I hate reading school books so I'm trying to get it over with as fast as possible! Honestly I have this love hate relationship with school, I hate it when I'm in it but I just want to be in it when I'm not and I keep extending my time in school with the directions I want to go.
Well after all the complaining and bitching and moaning about school by the end of the semester it always comes back to me that what I did was amazing. I honestly thought it wasn't that hard to keep good grades and that there's all sorts of students on the Dean's List and that having at 3.5 or above was just something that happened. However, I've come to learn that's not true. People aren't like me about school, constantly dedicated and wanting to do better non stop... so on and so forth. Starting early (really who does that lol)!? Well the end of semester last year came and I was excited to see that as nervous as I was about school I was on the Dean's List again 3rd semester in a row (the only one I didn't get was my first ever semester I wasn't really sure how to navigate and got a 2.8). Well that was awfully exciting for me but the real exciting news came today.
Once again I got a million things from UW ranging from bills to parking ticket notices... blah blah blah. Then there was one more... I opened the letter and it read "Congratulations! Your excellent academic record places you among the most academically distinguished Arts and Sciences students. You will be personally recognized at the annual Keith and Thyra Thomson Honors Convocation on Friday Oct. 9th, the ceremony will begin at 2:30."
At first I was like, well shoot that's my birthday weekend and we're planning to leave town... oh well. So I called my mom and she said absolutely not we are goint to the honors ceremony! She said this doesn't happen all the time and that it's a HUGE accomplishment to get this recognition it doesn't just happen for everyone! So of course I got excited and emailed them to RSVP right away. I guess I just always stress so much that I'm not doing good enough in my own eyes when in everyone else's eyes I'm doing amazing!

Short Post

I'm just posting a short one today because I'm not sure what to say I said a lot yesterday so not a whole lot now. I got a killer headache yesterday that lastest from 3p.m. til about 10 this morning, it totally sucked and made for a drag of a night! I went to work today which really wasn't all that interesting, I alphabetized a book (well continued to anyway) and did some dishes kinda boring! Other than that I haven't done much today. I'm getting ready to start on the baby room and put together the crib with talon which should be an adventure it's a HUGE crib lol! That's about all for today, off I go!

Slacker!!!

Wow! I've been slacking for almost one full month and I have lots of updates! Let's start with some awesome baby news! In a week from tomorrow I will know if I'm going to have a niece or a nephew! So exciting not that really it matters either way but still it's exciting to know what my sister is growing in there! I also went to one of her baby appointments last week and got to hear the baby's heart beat, it made it so real and amazing! She's 19 weeks on Wednesday and so it's getting closer and closer, according to her baby site she's 150 days away... from Cameo's wedding countdown I've realized that goes a lot faster than expected!!!

Next bit of exciting news, my sister is coming on September 3rd, I'd love to go pick her up but unfortunately I have my night class on Thursdays :( so she will be here for 5 days so until the 8th. THEN only 9 days after she leaves and goes back I fly out with my best friend's mom, brother, and dad to see her in Cali for a long weekend! I'm so excited for that too!!!! Hopefully, Cameo will fly back with us the 20th and stay for a couple weeks if not a whole month.

On the 3rd of Oct. I am doing a boudoir photo shoot. For those of you who don't know what boudoir is, it's like a sexy bedroom shoot where you get to showcase yourself. Here's a little bit more info on it from Steph's site! http://ardentboudoir.showitsite.com/#/faq/. Shane keeps asking me why I'm doing it and truthfully while I'd like him to see me that way it's more for me than him. It's all about the confidence. I was so into it I even convinced Cameo to do it while she's here too :)

Of course there's even more going on that week since it's my 21st birthday that week!!! ONLY 2 MONTHS LEFT!!!!!! The 6th (which is the day before my birthday) I'm having a slumber party which is a passion party only I feel like it's more tasteful and personal (and less expensive)! Then my birthday is the 7th :) Not sure yet what I'm going to do but probably not too much since it's the middle of the week, Shane says we have to go out and get my free drinks from places. I can drone through class the next day no problem. Then that weekend hopefully starting the 9th after my mom and I get off work we'll go down to either Denver or FoCo and have the real party which I'm very excited about! I'll invite the Ya-Ya's and the Junior/Yaya's in Training as well! Cameo will be down that week and Jocelyn is coming to also celebrate her 21st since Lance was baking during her 21st.

During this whole exciting month, time will be passing by while Lindsey bakes Little Glover. Hopefully this week we can finally get the room put together... all the stuff is just piled up in there all crazy like and it needs to be put together.

Last bit of awesomeness. About a month ago I did my FAFSA for the first time ever. Ugh I should've been doing it this whole time retard me yeahp! So I did it and have 3000 in grant money! WOOT WOOT!!! My credit cards with be paid off as of september and that is the most awesome thing ever (well money wise not life wise)! And Thursday I will officially be using a new 13 inch Dell Inspiron that my wonderful mom bought me. Ah, life is good! For a minute I needed to remember that :)